GRANDPA MIKE RAMIREZ “THE LATE” PATRIARCH
SAN BRUNO, CA — It is a very early January morning in 2007 when the phone rings and my Mother is in full “Panic Attack” mode. Between sobs, she tells me her husband Michael Ramirez, who was nearing the end due to Lung Cancer, “Mike needs you, Pete.”
GOT THERE “ALMOST” STAR TREK FAST!
Mike Ramirez isn’t like somebody I’m trying to help as a Cop, this man has for all intents & purposes, both good and bad, has been my “Father from the age of 12 on.”
PARAMEDICS ROLLING UP BEHIND ME
It appears Grandpa had “taken a header” while I was in route, so Mom called 911. As a Cop, you are a product of your training & experience when it comes to handling death. With Grandpa, it isn’t the same as I’m “falling apart“ from the inside-out!
GOTTA’ PUT UP A BRAVE FRONT
Having always had a keen sense of when the Grim Reaper (Death) was “in the room,” I once ran up to a boxing ring and BEGGED the referee to “stop a fight” between rounds. He told me to “go sit down.” Less than 30 seconds into the next round, Rico Velasquez was dead.
GRANDPA SENSED “GRIM REAPER” TOO!
So as they load Grandpa into the ambulance, I say, “They’re gonna give you some fluids and I’ll pick you up in a few hours. We can have steaks tonight on me.”
GRANDPA’S REALITY HIT ME HARD THAT DAY
And then he dropped the reality bomb as Grandpa took one last hard look at his home at 421 Hazel St in San Bruno and said, “I’m not coming back, Pete.” I started to both argue and cry, but I knew deep, down inside that Grandpa was probably right.
2 HOURS LATER & MOM IS IN HOSPITAL
Talk about a “mad house” at Kaiser South City, “Grandpa is leaving us” and Mom is down the hall in another hospital room suffering from Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease from Cigarettes. Both parents died because of Smoking related issues.
AIN”T NO POLICE ACADEMY COURSE TO DEAL WITH FAMILY DEATH
Having held a stabbing victim’s hand until he stopped breathing in the streets of the Potrero Police District of San Francisco, it was different. Because that was my job and this is my sister Raina’s father!
PASSING OUT & COMING BACK EVER SO “BRIEFLY”
The Dr. tells me outside the room that Grandpa Mike isn’t likely to finish the day. “The Cancer has him at the end” was the way thre MD put it. He and my mother’s daughter Raina was given the bad news, something she obviously didn’t want to hear and yet she remained somewhat composed “considering.”
GRANDPA BE “TELLING PETE STORIES”
“Remember the fight on Cortland?” he asked? Of all the tiffs I had, he remembered a street fight. Neighbor told him I was fighting, so Mike hustled 2 blocks only to “pull me off” somebody. In 52 amateur fights, there were 4 Golden Glove championships, a couple PAL titles as I went 38-14 overall.
LISTEN TO WHAT ANGELO DUNDEE ONCE SAID
“Everybody is in your dressing room when you win. It’s the people that are there when you lose, those are the people that care for you.” And for all 14 losses, Grandpa Mike was there!
GRANDPA PASSED “HOLDING MY HAND”
Having written for others to read for longer than most of you have been alive, writing this piece was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever put to paper.
SOME THINGS “YOU CAN’T FORGET”
For some reason unbeknownst to me, I was the only one in the room with Grandpa for his last few hours. The rest of the family was down the hall in Mom’s room.
MIKE IS COMING & GOING & THEN GONE!
As Mike “faded in and out” of consciousness, I kept thinking of my stupid ass friends that smoke and wondered, if they saw this firsthand, would it make them quit?
GRANDPA “CHECKS OUT” CIRCA MIDNIGHT
One of the last things he said to me before he died was, “Stop crying and take care of your Mother & sisters.” He took one more labored breath, his hand went limp and Grandpa Mike was gone!
LEARNED ONLY 1 THING WORKING IN JAILS
For a time in the early 1990’s, I had a California Teaching Credential with the Milpitas School District after the San Francisco Sheriff’s Dept. hired me to teach “Physical Education & Life Skills” to county jail inmates.
AND THE ONE THING I LEARNED IS…
Inmates could kick Crack, Crank, Heroin and Speed, but there were a good amount of them even after kicking hard drugs, the NICOTINE addiction was so strong they could NEVER quit smoking!
SAW ‘DARK SIDE” OF A SMOKING ADDICT
When a straight jailed White Banker type performed a Sexual act for a single cigarette, I realized how strong this addiction was and from that point forward I saw my parents in a different light.
IN CLOSING FOLKS….
Cigarettes killed my parents!
Pedro Fernandez
Note: Pedro is a multi-award winning writer whose career in journalism has taken him to 34 countries. He is also a former San Francisco Policeman and a Nationally Ranked 4-time Golden Gloves boxing champion. Find Pedro on Facebook as RINGTALK
In addition, he hosts “Ring Talk Worldwide” a syndicated radio talk show airing on the Sports Byline USA Network that has been on the air 41 years! You can watch it Sat & Sun @ 11:06 AM PT on YouTube or Twitch.TV via the Sports Byline USA channels.